It’s time, I don’t know how else to put it.
I started with my current employer in late 2000 and have had a great 10 years. After a large take-over (swamped) I decided that the little family I started with no longer existed. I recall back in the day when I was one of about 20 – 30 other people trying to make a difference. Growing the company, taking it places and trying to achieve the unthinkable. Moving down the track the network/infrastructure certainly grew from that small 4 rack setup of 20 machines to the current configuration of over 260 hosts and always growing. The growth within myself was absolutely awesome and pushed me in ways I couldn’t imagine. I can’t recall the amount of times I looked at a problem and thought, oh my, how the hell are we going to achieve that. But we did, endlessly. We moved in areas we never realised, from the introduction of ADSL, VOIP, Telephony, Web hosting, Colocation and the Education network, we moved in every direction, and often at the same time. I loved the feel of heading to work in the morning not knowing if I would be doing routine maintenance or something huge would come across my desk, something that would draw me in and force me to learn new tools, new procedures, new languages and new methods. I loved the feel of knowing that the creations inside my head were being pushed into the wild, used and abused by staff members and customers alike. It left you feeling like you were riding on the seam of your pants and it felt great. I loved the thrill when things would occassionally go wrong. I know, it sounds terrible, but I thrived on it. I found my stride when everything was falling down around me. I loved it all. The adventures of seeing a problem (sometimes already with a solution) and seeing a greater way to achieve the same result with better future proofing and more flexibility. I loved designing ideas at home on a smaller scale and then turning up at the office and seeing how it could apply to the monster we had created around us. I’ll miss all that, I’ll miss the 3am SMSs, the constant stupid questions from other departments after 15 billion times of telling them that you can’t point an A record at a sub-directory on a web server. I’ll miss the requests for somebody in our department to change a light globe, hang a picture or whatever mundane task needed performing as a high priority for day. I’ll miss the high priority tickets for things like changing a PTR on somebodies ADSL connection with only the concern that the default record looked “ugly”. I’ll miss all that.
Mainly, however, I’ll miss my family. That close group of people that you have known for so long that you feel that they are truely an extension of your own family. Those people that you know and trust on a daily basis, that you know, if you need a hand, be it at work or at home, you know they will be there. Those people that often spout something really stupid towards you only to trigger off a crazy idea that produces great results. Those people that you can banter with and know that they will never take offence to your crap bribbling behaviour. Those people that tell me I’m a dick-head when I need to be told. Those people that understand that sometimes you need quiet, sometimes you need to joke and sometimes you need to brainstorm even when they don’t understand the issue themselves, they are there always and will always be a part of my life, even after years and years, losing contact with many, as this often happens. I know that those people have driven me to become the person I am today. Adviced me in ways when I couldn’t see straight and moulded me when I was out of shape.
These are certainly things to feel a loss about, but they are not to feel sad about. I am moving on to other goals. I have stepped from this place and I am making a mark in another. I am looking forward to my new career and hope it treats me well with just as many happy years as my current employer has given me.